Players Who Sucked This Week

There’s a million baseballers on this week’s list again. Okay not a million but still too many to count.



What happened to the Senators on Sunday? All playoff games were close this past week except for the bludgeoning the Penguins gave them last night. Other than that, what we’ve seen from the the NHL playoffs thus far should make for an awesome Stanley Cup Final.



Danny Green went 5-18 from the field and shot .200 from long range. But would it really matter if he played better? Nope! The Warriors are still going to the Finals.

Matt Barnes shot .143 from the floor and missed all three-point attempts. Another bench-sitting player dude named Deron Williams wasn’t much better, shooting .182 from the field.

Both the Celtics and Cavaliers get a mention for being blown out by 44 points and blowing a huge lead, respectively.



Jered Weaver should consider retirement or the Padres need to cut him. He didn’t make it out of the first inning Friday night before giving up seven runs on five hits and two walks. Heck, even the opposing pitcher had an RBI and run scored in the first inning. He’s now 0-5 with a 7.44 ERA for the season.

Tommy Milone had two rough starts last week – he combined for 12 earned runs, four home runs, and five walks in eight total innings. He also earned his first two losses of the season.

The following guys pitched one game and that’s probably all the coach wanted to see: Ian Kennedy, Julio Teheran, Chris Heston, AJ Griffin, Julio Urías, Josh Tomlin, Zach Eflin, Scott Feldman, Jason Hammel, and Tom Koehler.

Chris Young added to Ian Kennedy’s terrible Sunday start, giving up three more runs in five innings of “relief” work.

Yovani Gallardo and Dillon Overton gave up 14 earned runs to the White Sox in 8 innings. Yikes!

“I’ll never figure out these guys”

Jarlin Garcia was a great relief pitcher if you were on the Astros or Dodgers. He gave up five runs in 3 ⅔ innings of work, boosting his ERA from 3.00 to 5.02.

Masahiro Tanaka let Yankees fans and this fantasy owner down. But I’m not too mad since it was against my Rays.

Mike Bolsinger started and lost two games last week, giving up nine earned runs in as many innings.

Mike Montgomery might’ve been the worst reliever of the week. In two games he allowed five runs in less than three innings while walking four batters. He was credited with the loss in the latter game. Enny Romero gave him a run for his money as the worst. Jose Alvarez, David Hernandez, Blake Wood, Donnie Hart, and Giovanni Gallegos are also here to join the terrible relief party.

Tanner Roark was not like himself last Thursday, surrendering seven runs in five innings. He even nearly upped his ERA a full point!

Oliver Perez had two relief appearances where he didn’t even record an out. Talk about being expendable.

Michael Ynoa appeared in just one game but it’s one he’ll want to forget (four runs and only one out). His teammate Anthony Swarzak joins him after giving up three runs without an out in his last appearance.

Junichi Tazawa and Brad Ziegler were both terrible last Monday. I got nothing clever to go with that.

Ryan Goins was the worst hitter of the week, going 1-23 from the plate with eight strikeouts. His teammate Darwin Barney cut it close by going 2-23. Adam Rosales was slightly better than both as he went 2-22 but then he had to strike out 12 times so now I don’t know who the worst hitter is.

Goins trying to figure out what went wrong.

Tuffy Gosewisch went 1-13 at the plate and struck out eight times. He was then demoted to triple-A. Justin Ruggiano was also terrible in 13 at-bats, dropping his BA by 36 points and striking out eight times as well.

TJ Rivera had a stunning .091 BA for the week but somehow managed to get an RBI.

Joe Panik got his act together by the end of the week, but still hit .111 in five games.

Luis Valbuena went without a hit in 17 at-bats but also had an RBI. His BA plummeted from .265 to .176.

Jace Peterson hit .125 for the somehow-second-place-Braves with nine K’s.


Dishonorable Mentions

Joe Musgrove is hit or miss. Should I drop him from my fantasy team? I’m leaning yes.

Chad Kuhl had a terrible Tuesday but bounced back yesterday against the Phillies.

Marc Andre-Fleury shutout the Senators last Monday, then allowed four goals on nine shots Wednesday before being pulled in the first period.


Got anyone to add? Write ‘em in the comments.


*Stats week of May 15-21


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Players Who Sucked This Week

I’m back after forgetting to do last week’s list, and there are a ton of baseball players on the list. Like what-the-heck-happened-to-these-players-last-week a ton.



Craig Anderson let up 11 goals in three games last week, losing two of them. With a .867 SV% in those three starts, he’s the lone hockey player on this week’s list.

The Oilers’ defense allowed 64 shots against Talbot Friday night and lost in double overtime; eight Anaheim skaters had 5 or more shots on goal. They got it together last night, beating the Ducks to force Game 7.



There weren’t any consistently terrible performers last week except some guy Dejounte Murray. Of note, Harden went 3-17 from the field in Wednesday’s loss to the Spurs.



Nick Tepesch didn’t last two innings before allowing 7 runs against the Red Sox Friday night.

The face you make after the two worst outings of your career.

Brett Anderson was any-word-you-can-think-of awful on the mound last week. In two starts he didn’t last two total innings, gave up 12 runs on 13 hits, and was credited with two losses. His ERA jumped from 3.54 to 8.18. This is mean, but maybe it’s a good thing he’s currently on the DL.

Jered Weaver is just terrible this year. No really, check out his game log.

Matt Belisle and Justin Haley combined for 10 runs in the 9th inning Sunday afternoon, 7 of them earned. The Twins ended up losing 17-6 instead of a respectable 7-6.

Mike Foltynewicz, Kyle Gibson, Alex Meyer, Kyle Kendrick, Nick Martínez, Trevor Bauer, Jameson Taillon, Mat Latos, Matt Moore, Marcus Stroman and Ian Kennedy all had a crappy start last week. They didn’t help any fantasy owners.

Ty Blach got his second start after a solid outing against the Padres (well duh), and really messed it up. Like three innings, 11 hits, eight earned runs, two homers, and a walk messed up.

Miguel Diaz was every hitter’s dream come true last week. In three appearances he pitched 2 ⅔ innings, gave up 10 total runs on seven hits, and walked four guys. His ERA is now 10.67.

Matt Cain pitched atrocious last Friday. I think he may have celebrated the Mexican holiday before the game because how else do you rationalize 10 hits, nine runs, and six walks in 3 ⅓ innings of work?

Basically sums up Cain’s career post-2013.

Brad Ziegler made two appearances and lost both. The worse one came Friday night when he gave up five runs without getting a batter out and the Marlins lost 8-7. Maybe he went out with Cain.

Luke Gregerson wasn’t quite as bad as Ziegler overall, but consistently sucked in both appearances. He allowed five runs between the two games, gave up five hits, but escaped both without a loss.

Cesar Valdez nearly matched Sonny Gray’s box score last Tuesday with five hits, four runs, and three home runs…except Valdez did it in one inning instead of six.

Austin Pruitt screwed up Blake Snell’s last start, giving up five runs on seven hits in the 6th inning which led to the Marlins beating the Rays at home.

Josh Collmenter helped contribute to three losses for the Braves last week, giving up six runs over four innings of relief work. But who’s worse was Matt Wisler, giving up seven runs in less than two innings.

Dylan Covey gave up six runs in each of his starts, had a WHIP of 2.16, and lost both.

Abraham Almonte, Chris Heisey, and Austin Hedges all went hitless last week. Yup, not even one basehit.

Danny Espinosa also went hitless, but his streak goes back to April 28. His season BA sits at .147.

What did Matt Wieters, Carlos Gonzalez, Christian Vazquez, Kelby Tomlinson, Jackie Bradley Jr., Ryan Flaherty, Yasmany Tomas, and Russell Martin all have in common last week? Getting just one hit in 10 or more at bats.

Carlos Gomez and Shin-Soo Choo both managed four hits in 25+ at bats last week.

Steven Souza Jr. collected two hits in 17 at-bats, struck out seven times, and dropped his average 27 points in the slumping process. The Rays season looks pretty similar to his stat line.

Jason Heyward hasn’t improved much from last year, and he only got worse in his last five games going 1-13.


Dishonorable Mentions

Jeremy Hellickson wasn’t awful but really didn’t pitch that great in two starts. He didn’t make it through the 5th inning in both and gave up nine runs in nearly as many innings.

John Gibson played well in his first two starts winning both against the Oilers, but then allowed three goals on six attempts to start yesterday’s game. Jonathan Bernier didn’t help by allowing two more in the first, then another two before they lost 7-1.


Got anyone to add? Write ‘em in the comments.


Stats week of May 1-7


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Players Who Sucked This Week


No man or team really sucked this past week. Actually, both games were blowouts so, yes, I supposed I could nominate the Steelers’ and Packers’ defenses.

The stage is set for Super Bowl LI

The stage is set for Super Bowl LI


The St. Louis Blues were so bad this week, all three of their goalies made the list: Jake Allen, Carter Hutton, and Pheonix Copley. Allen allowed four goals on 10 shots, Hutton gave up eight, and Copley had a rough first career start.

This happened a lot last week.

This happened a lot last week.

Cam Ward might’ve had the worst week of his career. He gave up 17 goals in two and a half games, with a horrendous .800 SV%.

Semyon Varlamov gave up five goals to the Blackhawks at home, then injured his groin. He will be out til the All-Star break, so I won’t be writing about him again for another month.

Chad Johnson and Brian Elliott. Johnson was pulled six minutes into  Saturday’s game after allowing three goals on only four shots; Elliot came in and allowed four, then he gave up another four to the Maple Leafs last night. And this is why Calgary won’t go anywhere this year.

Ben Bishop was terrible against the Coyotes – five goals on 17 shots in two periods – and the Lightning shooters didn’t help either, making three goals on 48 attempts.



Dario Saric was by far the worst shooter of the week – in his last four games, he has shot .147 from the field and .200 from beyond the arc. Woof.

"Why won't you cooperate!!"

“Why won’t you cooperate!!”

DeMarre Carroll was almost as bad as Saric, shooting .167 from the field and .143 from long range. Mirza Teletovic was just as bad as Carroll from the field (.167 FG%) and even worse from long range, missing all nine attempts.

DJ Augustin didn’t help the Magic much in his last three games, going 7-25 from the court and .214 from three-point land. Same can be said for Trey Lyles of the Jazz.


Players Who Sucked Again

Just wanna give Jake Allen of the St. Louis Blues his appropriate shout out here. Way to do it again. In back to back weeks and in the same article.


Dishonorable Mentions

Two pairs of goalies gave up 7-6 scores this past week: Antti Niemi and Henrik Lundqvist started the trend last Tuesday. Then Mike Condon and Joonas Korpisalo copied them Sunday night. Better thank each other for ending up here.


Got anyone to add? Write ’em in that comment box.


Stats week of 1/17-23


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Players Who Sucked This Week

Some questions you may be having this Tuesday evening: Football is almost over, so who will blow the playoffs for his team? Which goalies should I drop from my fantasy team? Why didn’t you do this last week? How many shots did that guy miss? Well, I will answer three of those. Kinda.



Brock Osweiler played as you’d expect his overpaid self to play on the road against the Pats. Really not much else to say about him at this point.

osweiler coming

Hopefully ending*


Steve Mason started three games and lost two. He gave up a total of 12 goals in them, which makes him the worst goalie of the week. 

flyers goalie

Matt Murray gave up 11 goals in just two games, but lucked out winning the second in last night’s wild shootout against Washington. Jake Allen lost both of his starts, letting three pucks go by him in each game, in only 45 minutes of playing time.

Connor Hellebuyck played 24 atrocious minutes, allowing 6 goals on 13 shots. He might even be worse than Mason. Marc-Andre Fleury is regarded as a top goalie, but allowed 10 goals in his last two starts. That’s also pretty bad.

Henrik Lundqvist gave up 3 goals a piece in back to back games, losing both. He hasn’t been great in the month of January either.



Donatas Notiejunas made just one out of 11 shots. Lance Thomas also sucked shooting, going 2-13 in three games.

"I totally don't got this"

“I totally don’t got this”

Darrun Hilliard went 2-12 from the field, and must have been too scared to even attempt another in his next game.

Mike Muscala missed his last 8 shots, then didn’t play the following game. Coincidence?

Jamal Crawford is getting too old and being on my list too often. He should consider retirement. Channing Frye is also old and terrible this week, but he might not need to retire just yet.

Spencer Dinwiddie was really inconsistent this week – he failed to make a basket in two of his four games – and nearly fouled on Sunday night. And what a last name.

Michael Kidd-Gilchrist couldn’t shoot too well (5-23) unless it was a free throw (8-8).


Players Who Sucked Again

I decided not to crown anyone this time since I slacked off last week. Lucky for you suckboys.


Dishonorable Mentions

Tom Brady won yet another playoff game, but played terrible by his standards – two interceptions and a 47% completion rate, at home. Ben Roethlisberger also had a lackluster performance, but rode his team to victory. The AFC Championship game better not be that bad.


Antti Niemi played well in his first two games of the week, but let all three shots go by him against the Wild on Saturday. Tuuka Rask wasn’t worthy of two wins in 4 games. Carey Price got better as the week went on, giving up 7 then 4 then 1.


Got anyone to add? Write ’em in that comment box.

*Stats week of 1/10-16


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